Under Construction
I’m under construction…please excuse my mess…
In the meantime, please enjoy my links, conveniently located to your right…
Active Kids = Better Sleepers
Who would have guessed?
A recently published study (Nixon et al. 2009) has confirmed what we moms already know…active kids sleep better.
Participants in this study included nearly 600 seven-year-olds. The major study findings were:
- Most children took about 26 minutes to fall asleep after bedtime
- More active children fell asleep faster and slept better
- One hour of vigorous activity per day decreased the time to fall asleep by almost 6 minutes
- Sedentary kids had more difficulty falling asleep after going to bed
- One hour of sedentary activities per day increased the time to fall asleep by 3 minutes
Reference: Nixon et al. (2009). Arch Dis Child, 94(9):686-9.
For more information about kids and sleep, check out these online resources:
KidsHealth.org — All About Sleep
National Sleep Foundation — Children and Sleep
Wishing you and your children a good night’s sleep!
Buddhism for Mothers (Chapter 2)
Parenting Mindfully
“Wherever we go, wherever we remain, the results of our actions follow us.” — The Buddha
Like most moms, I tend to pride myself on my ability to multi-task. You know, talking on the phone while giving my kids a bath. Paying bills while my kids play on the floor below my desk. Thinking about my “To Do” list while reading bedtime stories….and so on. However, this “efficiency” comes at a cost. First of all, it isn’t really efficient because it’s hard to actually accomplish anything with my mind spread so thin. Today, for example, I started loading the dishwasher in the morning, sorting my mail in the afternoon, and folding laundry in the evening. Come time for bed, the dishwasher was still full of dirties, the mail was in multiple piles all over the dining room table, and I had to dump the laundry back into the empty basket just to be able to lie down.
The second cost of multi-tasking is that it prevents me from being mindful to the task at hand (whatever that may be). What does it mean to be mindful? It means “knowing what’s happening at the time it’s happening” (Napthali p. 19). For example, listening when our children speak to us, noticing our own feelings, and recognizing what’s going on around us.
Being mindful for our kids means:
- Listening to them
- Trying to understand their point of view
- Treating them with respect
- Keeping realistic expectations of our children
- Being “present” for their special and everyday moments
Being mindful for ourselves means:
- Willingness to learn from our children
- Maintaining awareness of our own feelings and needs
- Saving energy by concentrating on one task at a time
- Increasing calmness by focusing on the present
- Understanding that everything we do or say to our children will have some result
My lesson for this week: Appreciate the abundance of special moments in my life, even in the most ordinary of days.
With a “Beginner’s Mind”,
Michelle
Eco-Healthy Kids
15 ways to make your home healthier for your kids and the planet…
- Use non-toxic pest control methods whenever possible both inside and outside your home.
- Wash fruits and vegetables well before eating them.
- Make sure your home is adequately ventilated to prevent excess moisture, mold, and mildew.
- Maintain good air quality by avoiding scented candles, air-fresheners, or smoking within your home. Do not allow vehicles to idle for long periods near your home.
- Use biodegradable, non-toxic cleaning products. Avoid aerosol sprays.
- Use low-VOC household paints.
- Protect your children from lead, mercury, and radon exposure (see resources below for more information).
- Keep your furniture in good condition to help limit exposure to flame retardants in foam or stuffed furniture.
- Choose furniture made of solid wood whenever possible. Avoid particleboard.
- Vacuum daily and clean carpets and rugs at least twice a year with non-toxic, biodegradable carpet cleaners.
- Select non-toxic art supplies (look for a seal from ACMI).
- Avoid toys made from soft plastic vinyl. Look for toys labeled “PVC-free.”
- Choose “safe plastics” or glass for bottles and sippy cups.
- Avoid play equipment made with treated wood.
- Reduce, reuse, and recycle!
Web Resources:
Art & Creative Materials Institute (ACMI)
Mother Funking
I’m finally starting to come out of this funk I’ve been in for the past couple of weeks…
I thought it would be a good time to share some of my favorite de-funking ideas in the hopes they will benefit some of you other moms having a rough day (week, month, year!), and also as a gentle reminder to myself the next time I get down (because that’s exactly when I tend to forget to take care of myself)…
Just think of this list as “Self-Care for Mommies 101″:
1. Get outside. Get some fresh air and sunshine.
2. Get some exercise (even if it’s just a 5-minute walk).
3. Get some help…with cooking, cleaning, childcare, whatever you need…
4. Get some R&R. Take a nap. Take a hot bath. Take some deep breaths. Listen to some soothing music.
5. Do something nice for yourself. Get a massage or buy some new perfume.
6. Do something social. Spend time with friends and family. Do something fun — even if you don’t feel like it.
7. Have a good laugh. Read the comics or watch a funny movie. Check out one of my “Good Humor” links!
8. Accomplish something. Choose a small task from your to-do list and just do it.
9. Have a good cry…it’s rain for the brain!
10. Always, always, always remember that taking care of yourself will allow you to be a better mother!
Buddhism for Mothers (Chapter 1)
Buddhism and Motherhood
This first chapter of Buddhism for Mothers is basically a primer on Buddhism…who, what, where, when, why, and how?
The focus of this chapter is an introduction to the teachings of the Buddha, the essence of which, “is captured by the Four Noble Truths” (Napthali, p. 4) and how these teachings relate to mothering…
Truth #1. There is suffering. In other words, life is not perfect. Life brings anxiety, discomfort, and irritation. Think sleepless nights, tantrums, worries about our children’s health, and so on…
Truth #2. Attachment causes suffering. In other words, our suffering is caused by our own desires and expectations. Our desires may include unrealistic expectations of our children; wanting our children to be like us, believe like us, and act like us; or simply wanting our children to have the best clothes, the best toys, the best of everything…
Truth #3. Suffering can end. We only need to become enlightened! In my case, this is likely to take quite some time!
Truth #4. There is a path to end suffering. The path to enlightenment requires us to become wise (we must be thoughtful and understanding), ethical (we must speak, act, and live with compassion, kindness, and fairness toward others), and mentally displined (primarily through the practice meditation; more about this later in the book)…
By following this path, the author concludes that we will benefit ourselves as mothers, as well as our children.
On a personal note, the above message comes to me at a challenging time. I have been in quite the “funk” for the past two weeks. I have been mopey and short-tempered with my husband and my children. I haven’t been enjoying my children the way I “should.” I can’t quite put my finger on what is bothering me…but I think the answer lies somewhere in unrealistic expectations for myself and for others. Work is challenging and I can’t keep up with the chores at home either. I have a task list a mile long and lack the energy to put a dent in it. I want to be the “perfect mother” but don’t have the energy to do that either. I haven’t been blogging or writing as much as usual (I did, however, receive two more rejection letters from publishers this week). I’m struggling just to be “good enough” these days…
Perhaps the way out of this mess starts with the first Noble Truth…acceptance that there is and always will be suffering in this life. From there, I can move on to letting go of some of my unrealistic expectations. Clearly, I am unable to accomplish (perfectly, no less) all that is on my “to do” list at this time. I shall start with one small task per day and call that “good enough.” And I will give my kids some extra hugs and kisses…
Best Wishes,
Michelle
P.S. I hope some of you will read along with me and share your thoughts on the book, applying it to your life, and so on…
Spelling Lessons
I just have to report this delightful conversation I had with my 4-almost-5-year-old daughter recently. She had just gone shopping with her daddy for a new toy horse. She really wanted a “girl horse”, so she systematically looked underneath each toy horse to find one with the correct anatomy. Alas, they were all stallions, so she had to “settle” for a boy horse.
And then…a few seconds after finishing her story, she asked this question:
“Mommy, did you know that [male anatomy] starts with a P? Puh…puh…[male anatomy].”
Thanks for the spelling lesson, Sweetie! (and the laughs)
Fit Mama Week 6
I won’t even bother apologizing for my lack of posts over the past couple of weeks. You know how it goes…
My goals were to:
1. Keep working on self-monitoring of food, beverages, and physical activity.
2. Purchase a new pedometer and record steps per day. Aim for 8,500 steps per day.
3. Review list of motivations daily.
4. Drink 6-8 servings of water per day (including at least 5 servings at work on work days). Limit high-calorie beverages including sodas (not a big issue for me), fruit juices, and alcoholic beverages. Try drinking sparkling water, coffee, and tea (without a lot of cream and sugar) instead.
Lessons learned:
1. I suck at self-monitoring. But, I promise to keep trying. In fact, I pledge to print myself several weeks worth of food records right after I finish this post.
2. I did not buy another pedometer. I admit that I’m dragging my feet because I’ve already tried two different models and I hate wasting money on yet another gadget that might not work. Will keep using the old models until I get so fed up that I’m willing to shell out some dough for a new gadget.
3. The good news is that I’m still walking pretty regularly 2-3 days per week with a colleague at work, about 20-30 minutes at the end of each work day.
4. The bad news: I experienced a “set-back” when my family came to visit. First, Crispy Kreme doughnuts for breakfast one morning, then pies for dessert two nights in a row, and then a cake for an early bday celebration for my daughter. I regained 1 lb in this process. *sigh*
5. The good news: Reviewing my list of motivations helped me get back on track and lose 2.5 pounds over the past week or so (10 pounds to go to reach my initial goal). Yeah…one step backward and two steps forward?
6. I’m doing much better with water consumption and limiting high calorie beverages. Some examples: I keep a pitcher of water at my desk and also drink water with meals. I’ve switched to low-fat milk in my coffee instead of half-and-half (and one lump of sugar instead of two). I dilute fruit juices with sparkling water and serve over ice. I drink herbal teas unsweetened. I’m limiting alcoholic beverages to 2-3 servings per week.
Goals for next week (June 15-21):
1. Keep working on self-monitoring of food, beverages, and physical activity.
2. Make do with my old pedometer (if I can’t bring myself to purchase a new pedometer) and record steps per day. Aim for 9,000 steps per day (or walk 30+ minutes per day, 6 days per week).
3. Review list of motivations daily.
4. Continue drinking 6-8 servings of water per day and limiting high-calorie beverages.
5. Eat 6-11 servings of breads, pastas, and cereals per day (make as many servings as possible whole grain). This equates to about about 2 servings per meal or snack! If you want to learn more about the importance of eating whole grain foods for weight loss (and improved health in general), click here.
How are you doing? Please post your successes, challenges, and comments below.
Best Wishes, Michelle
More parenting videos on JuiceBoxJungle
If You Give a Mom a Muffin
This charming little poem, based on the, “If you Give a Mouse a Cookie” series by Laura Numeroff arrived in my inbox a while back. Thanks to my friend Sue for sharing this with me, and now I will share with you:
If you give a mom a muffin,
She’ll want a strong cup of coffee to go with it,
She’ll make herself some.
Her three-year-old will spill the coffee,She’ll wipe it up.
While wiping the floor she’ll find dirty socks.
She’ll remember she has to do laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer, she’ll trip over boots and bump into the box of Goodwill items.
Bumping into the Goodwill items will remind her that she has to get these boxes out of her basement and into the car.
When she puts the boxes in the car, she’ll find a bag of groceries and this will remind her she has to cook dinner.
She will get out the chicken defrosting in the fridge.
She’ll look for her cookbook, “101 Things To Do With Chicken”
The cookbook will be sitting under a pile of mail.
She will see the Netflix movie she’s meant to send back and the phone bill, which is due tomorrow.
The checkbook will be in her purse that is being dumped out by her one-year-old.
As she bends down to rescue her purse, she’ll smell something funny.
She’ll change the baby’s diaper.
While she is throwing away the diaper and searching for the hand sanitizer, the phone will ring.
Her three-year-old will answer and hang up.
She’ll remember she wants to call a friend – not for coffee, but for a very strong drink.
Thinking of drinking will remind her that she was going to have a cup of coffee in order to stay awake for the rest of the day.
And chances are….
If she finds her cup of coffee (which she has to reheat by now), Her children will have eaten the muffin that goes with it.
by Kathy Fictorie
Hang in there Moms!!!
And if you’re in the mood to share the originals with your kiddos, click on the book covers below for more info:
by Laura Numeroff
by Laura Numeroff
by Laura Numeroff
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